While I Sleep

The alarm is set for 4:00am, and I pray that my sleep is restful. If it isn’t, I’m likely to sleep for a good 6-8 hours tomorrow anyway.

My Love, if you read this during my surgery, please close your eyes and let yourself feel me take your hand in mine. Thank you for being so strong and keeping our whole family together through this. I’ll be back together with you soon, but new and improved. In a few months we will be back into our routine but stronger and wiser than before. The only reason that I do not fear this artificial sleep is that I look forward to seeing your beautiful face when I wake up. You are my best friend and my everything and I cannot wait to be reunited with you.

Bode and Scarlett, your innocent faces warm my heart and I take the memory of them with me when I close my eyes. You have both filled my life with a joy that I cannot describe to you, but you may only know one day when you have children of your own. Thank you for giving me every reason to live every single day, and the strength to conquer anything.

To my brothers, Dan and David. I know you will be in the waiting room with Mandi and that brings me comfort. Keep her company and keep her spirits high. Do the same for each other and find a reason to laugh tomorrow. I would do the same if I were in your shoes.

Mama, I know that in your mind, you have already seen me walk through all of this unscathed. The peace that you feel each day is a beautiful thing and everyone will be able to draw on some of that tomorrow.

To all my friends, family, colleagues, and supporters. Thank you for every text message, voicemail, phone call, comment, card, prayer or visit. The outpouring of love has been nothing short of astounding. Good night everyone.